A lot of changes come with being a mom, a wife, and simply a woman. In fact, many of us give up so much for our spouses and our children, including careers, money, and even a passionate hobby. We live to see our children and other people happy, but we rarely acknowledge our own happiness. We go through life thinking that happiness for us is seeing other people happy. That becomes our complete essence in life. But when your children grow up or you get a divorce, we forget how to live for ourselves.
According to Psychology Today, midlife transitions can include but are not limited to:
- Discontentment or boredom with life or with the lifestyle (including people and things) that have provided fulfillment for a long time
- Feeling restless and wanting to do something completely different
- Questioning decisions made years earlier and the meaning of life
- Confusion about who you are or where your life is going
- Irritability, unexpected anger
- Persistent sadness
- Acting on alcohol, drug, food, or other compulsions
- Greatly decreased or increased sexual desire
- Sexual affairs, especially with someone much younger
- Greatly decreased or increased ambition.
Now that my kids are teens and my husband is retired from the military and I don’t have to work anymore, I find life is calming down for me. Some women may like that, but that’s not good for a woman like myself who is used to always being active. I’ve been deep in thought lately, my mind is whirling like a tornado full of “what ifs” and wondering “what’s next”. I often try to find new and exciting things to do, a hobby, a craft, a passion.
I tried cooking. It didn’t work out.
I tried sewing. Nope, just nope!
Sometimes it’s hard to let go of the past and even harder to look forward to the future when I can’t find myself anymore, but as long as I keep trying new things, I’m positive I’ll find that special part of myself I knew before kids and before my husband. Then when I find it, that tiny spark can re-ignite a flame and I’ll be on fire all over again!